As this year draws to a close, I
have been reflecting on the article referenced in Sunday morning’s message by
Carl Trueman (“An Unmessianic Sense of Non-Destiny,” Reformation 21 blog, April
20, 2010). The article addresses Trueman’s own confrontation with mid-life
crisis. He awoke to the realization that opportunity for great accomplishments
he hoped to achieve was essentially over. If he were to have an untimely departure,
the world would not be in great anguish over its loss. In Trueman’s words, “I
knew I would continue to write and even to do research, but I would do these
for the pleasure I found in them, not because I believed it was my God-given
task to enrich the waiting world with my pearls of wisdom.” The common sense of
this insight stands in stark contrast to the prideful and self-deluded opinion
many, even Christians, tend to have of their perceived self-importance.
Years ago, a friend conveyed to
me a negative evaluation by a respected and successful pastor of my own
prospects. Apparently, my friend agreed, and his telling me was not designed to
boost my confidence. So how did I take this assessment? (To put it in context,
I grew up with a serious inferiority complex. I am not sure how I came to see
myself in that light, but I battled feelings of worthlessness for years and
still have occasional relapses. Inferiority is really a form of pride—a
reverse pride that stokes anger because others fail to see just how great and
important one really is or could be.)
Paul’s words to the Corinthian
church in the face of attacks on his own apostleship and ministry were very
helpful to me (1 Corinthians 4). Every believer is but a servant of Christ and
a steward of God’s will. God expects His servants to be faithful, not
spectacular. Neither are we to be overly concerned with how others see us, not
even in our self-judgment. Jesus is the only judge, and He “will bring to
light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the
heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God” (v. 5). In the
meantime, we must not be puffed up about our own importance. “What do you
have that you did not receive? If then you received it, why do you boast as if
you did not receive it?” (v. 7).
The only thing we ought to care
about is what the Lord thinks of us. Are we good kingdom citizens? Are we
obedient? Are we submissive and open to what He will teach us from His Word?
Are we faithfully applying what we know and seeking to be a blessing to our
brothers and sisters in Christ? As Trueman argued, our special destiny as
believers “is to be part of the church, and it is the church that is the big
player in God’s wider plan, not us. . . . We all need to cultivate that certain
unmessianic sense of non-destiny which will make us better citizens of the
kingdom.” Let this be our resolve as we enter the new year.